Just About Anything

How I Didn't Meet Your Mother

2010-06-05T20:05:00.003+05:30

Year 2035.

Kids I have wasted last 5 years of your life telling about your fictional uncle Barney, extremely fictional Aunt Robin. Uncle Marshal, though, was not fictional but for every Uncle Marshal I had, there was one Aunt Lily who hated me so much that I have 19 restraining orders against my name till date.

Today I will tell you how I didn't meet your mother. This has to do with your father's upbringing. Don't get excited yet, because just like past five years, here also I will tell you nothing even remotely relevant to your mother.

Back in 1990's there was no internet. Your father was going through a changing time in his life and he had many questions. All he got was Grihashobha, Sarita and occasionally, Mayapuri, courtesy monthly visit to the barber shop. The only thing that came to his rescue was Bollywood, the answers of his every and basic queries!

In those days, bollywood never said anything out loud but very subtly used to give all the answers I required. It was during those times when I saw a movie named Andaaz. It was made by a visionary called David Dhawan who dreamt of India as a free country, where knowledge would have no boundaries. His later master piece was "Sarkai Leo Khatiya"

Now, Andaaz was a movie way ahead of its time, it dealt with secret school girl fantasies that you might find some where in my hard disc. There are a lot of similar asian movies made by amature film makers, but this one was one hell of a main stream movie. The movie also had some villains and violence, but I will not go there knowing how impressionable the mind is at your age.

The story is about a school girl, Karishma Kapoor, obsessing with his handsomely mustached teacher, Anil Kapoor. She dresses in short skirts and writes suggestive messages for him. She even dreams about a song which involved lot of pelvic thrusts and hip grinding. The honest, innocent teacher starts worrying, not about sex with a minor, but about his reputation and potential job loss. He takes a leave of one day and comes back with a wife, Juhi Chawla, who by all accounts had zero knowledge about birds and bees. So she has to be given some lessons in Sex 101, and look how she responded!

Since the school kid was still obsessed by the teacher, she offers him a threesome chance (well not exactly, but that's how I remember the story). The wifey, now all too smart, becomes upset and banishes the husband from the house.

Now kids at that time your dad didn't know what are the after-effects of banishment, all he thought was the husband will not get home cooked food for some days. The director came to the rescue and taught me what the banishment actually meant. I still consider David Dhawan to be my first teacher, who taught me so much just at the age of 11.

At this point in the movie, the villains enter and do some bad things. In the end, the poor school girl dies, with a dream of threesome in her eyes. The now smart wifey suggests that the closest they can get to a threesome now was to make her husband put a MangalSootra aorund the dying girl's neck. Her wish was fulfilled!

So kids now you will wonder how this is related to your mother! Actually after watching this movie, I made a notion in my mind that school/college girls only desire:

a) Teachers

b) Handsome men with mustache

c) Guys who can carry off a leather jacket while thrusting their pelvis in the air

d) All of the above

Since I fell into neither of these categories, I decided to study hard and make sure that I go to a college where the probability of interaction with a girl was a statistician's delight. That's how I didn't meet your mother. Some day I will tell you more about my other paranoias.

Who Stole Dhoni's Phone?

2010-04-09T11:54:00.000+05:30

In an interesting turn of events, Angad Bedi has been charged with stealing CSK's captain Mahinder Singh Dhoni's phone. He was found taking interviews on his new phone. According to reports Angad had to resort to phone interviews as people complained about his sheepish grin which accompanied his stupid questions. The phone grabbed the attention only when Mr. Bedi started mouthing features of the phone just like Dhoni. It is to be noted that Angad is paying out of his pocket to be on the show and how is he able to afford such a phone raised eyebrows of CSK and SET Max owners.

Sources close to Angad told that it is a conspiracy to defame the rising star. "He is the next Mandira", quipped one of Angad's friend. It is been said that the above mentioned phone was thrown at Angad by Parthiv Patel when he approached him for an interview. Parthiv has earlier been accused of throwing a mike at Arnab Goswami and throwing a glass of water on Sagarika Ghose. Parthiv commented that all these were acts of self defense

On being questioned, Angad's close friend, Lakshman Shiv Ramakrishnan responded "Do you know how demeaning his job is? He has to interview failed stars, fat owners and even Jazzy B, and poor boy can't call somebody for help as he can't even afford a phone"

LSR added, "Along with doing interviews of "stars", poor guy also has to give facial to Samir Kochhar every half an hour and has to trim Arun Lal's facial hair every two days. The day he refused to shave Gaurav Kapur was the day when he was charged with theft." It was later found out the LSR has a habit of referring to himself in third person.

DD captain, known for his frank opinions commented, "Why is Dhoni so upset about losing a phone, he can buy a new one just from the income of one strategic timeout?". He chose not to comment on why he shares his mobile phone with Sehwag inspite of earning half as much as Dhoni.

Meanwhile India TV has backtracked its breaking news "Kya Dhoni ka mobile Adrashya ho jata hai" and replaced it with, "Hogaya Pardafash, Chor Nacha Maidan Me". A file photo of Angad with Jazzy B was shown every 3rd minute to confirm the story.

In another development, Celina Jaitely has welcomed how this IPL has stood up for the gay rights. She pointed out the Karbonn Kamal ad where two leading cricketers share one mobile phone. She said that it is very deep and symbolic. She also pointed out to the Nivea Men ad where Shahid says "Main roz din me ek minute Nivea Men lagata hu". She said although the ad is too much in your face but still every small step counts, even if it lasts only for one minute. She categorically denied commenting about L.Shivramakrishnan's thighs and asked us to contact Danny Morrsion for further input. She also said how the blimp was symbolic to something but nothing could be heard as people ran for cover seeing Shivamani enter the stadium.

LSD - I wish I had a camera with me

2010-03-21T15:44:00.005+05:30

Miss Pinky 1: Yeh kya hai? Why did u bring me to this movie yaar?

Miss Pinky 2: Sach me!! Bloody critics. Faltu me taareef karte hai

MP1: Kuchh samajh me nahi aa raha hai ki kehna kya chahte hai.

MP2: Remeber Dev.D? Kya mast film thi! Uske baad director ne yeh film kyo banayi ?

MP3: No yaar, that was some other director, he is Khosla guy

MP4: Itni bhi buri nahi hia film, woh love story achhi thi, but baad me woh axe se marte kyo hai, Couldn't understand!

MP1: Yaaaaaaa!! So Gross na?

MP2: Abhi to kewal interval hua hai!!!

MP1: Chalo Prasad's chalte hai, Karthik Calling Karthik lagi hai

MP2: ...but uska show 5 baje ka hai

MP3: Baithate hai yehi..tab tak, heard its got 3 stories in it

MP1: I just hope that third story has Imraan Khan in it

MP3: No yaar, they have all these new actors, no star :(

MP1: They should have taken Abhay atleast

MP2: Yaa Dev.D was so cool yaaar

MP4: Shhhhhh its starting now, lets sit for a while na!!

Silence (coupled with some giggling) for next 1 hr

There was a similar but full of profanities conversation going on between the two guys sitting next to me, wo fir kabhi. The reactions of Miss Pinkies is quite similar to Ekta Kapoor's at the trail screening

Btw I found the movie absolutely brilliant, don't know whether it falls into dark comedy category, but it was very disturbing and very funny in a natural way. Pity some people didn't like it. (Everybody is entitled to their opinion!) and the hall was 3/4 empty (12 noon show generally is empty though).

I wish I had a camera to record all the conversations happening in the theater, would have made a good watch nonetheless.

Players To Watch Out For In IPL 3

2010-03-05T03:19:00.006+05:30

With IPL round the corner, few million eye balls will be glued to television for 45 days but who has the time and energy to follow each and every player so that their daily quota of entertainment remained fulfilled. I have decided to do a public service in order to separate wheat from the chaff. Here come a list of player you must watch out for in this season of IPL

1.Ajit Agarkar

Team: KKR

Playing Role: Allrounder. Can snatch defeat from jaws of victory by his bowling as well as powerless hitting

Strength: Lethal short pitch yorkers.

Description: The ball pitches at 115 Kmph on 11th yard and makes a gentle loop towards batsman's boots. Only two outcomes are possible.

Unnecessary trivia1: Statistics show that since 1998 only 3 kids have been named Ajit

Unnecessary trivia2: Google images suggests to search for his wife when user searches for his name

Unnecessary gossip: Report have emerged that Musli Power Plus has been after SRK to let them use Agarkar in their ads of "before and after". They are planning to use Chris Gayle's picture as their "after" guy.

2. S Sreesanth

Team: KXIP

Playing Role: Entertainer

Strength: Wide short pitch yorker

Description: A variation of Agarkar's delivery which goes wide of batsman's boot after pitching short.

Unnecessary trivia: He doesn't date upcoming actress or publicity hungry models

Unnecessary gossip: He wants Shiamak Davar as India's coach

3.Wridhiman Saha

Team: KKR

Playing role: Batsman/Bowler/Wicketkeeper/Selector. His good luck can injure all the 11 players and then he can play any role he wishes too.

Strength: His looks

Description: His baboon-ish looks can scare any bowler amidst a lush green outfield.

Unnecessary trivia: He is the first pure batsman to make an unwanted debut for India since Vikram Rathore made his debut in 1995.

Unnecessary gossip: It is said that Rohit Sharma did not play the first test against SA due to mental trauma as opposed to injury reported in media. Reports say that it was caused when Saha played a prank on him and wore fur coat and jumped on his bed.

4. Swapnil Asnodkar

Team: RR

Playing Role: Runner for injured players

Strength: Running between the wickets

Description: His backfoot stance and freakishly short legs amuse fielders so much that they stop to watch him run instead of throwing the ball at the stumps.

Unnecessary trivia: Goa government is a planning marathon in his honor.

Unnecessary gossip: He was reportedly asked to model for Complan

5. Joginder Sharma

Team: CSK

Playing role: Match maker

Strength: He can turn match anyway with his all-round abilities.

Description: Proven match maker, made a match of the T20 WC final by bowling 4 extremely poor deliveries and taking wicket on one such.

Unnecessary trivia: He is just 26!

Unnecessary gossip: Rumor is that he works as a part time tailor and a barber in Haryana. Probably these rumors are based on his rugged looks

6. S Sriram

Team: RCB

Playing role: Sheet Anchor

Strength: Can hold his breath under water for more than 10 minutes.

Description: Indian team actually tried to drown him in Bangladesh once. He returned to score a breathtaking half century at amazing strike rate of 60 against an attack consisting of Tapash Baisya and Khaled Mahmud

Unnecessary trivia: His bowling economy is better than Srisanth's

Unnecessary gossip: Rumors float that he will be opening the innings for RCB in IPL3. Source for this rumor has been attributed to the man himself.

Sadly teams have removed many such players from their payroll who were once a part of IPL1. Hopefully I will post about the players I am missing in my next post.

Few worst ads of recent times

2010-02-27T00:54:00.004+05:30

Few ads which make me scream WTF from the moment the air.

1. JK Super Cement: Seriously guys what is it? A girl in one piece bikini walks out of pool and the voice over says "Vishwas hai, isme kuch khaas hai" Is there some sort of pun which I am not getting because this bikini girl and cement are in no way related, or this ad was intended to be for JK's Super Semen instead?

2. Imagine you are going out of station for few days, and your good friend doesn't forget to mention that "dude you might die". In olden times we just used to say "have a safe journey." By the way the "good" friend seemed more interested in his wishes-to-be-dead friend's wife. Also who in the world says these lines "Yaar sir jhuka ke kyo baitha hai, sir utha ke ji".

3. This one is supposed to be funny, new age commercial. Instead it comes out to be corny and cheap somehow. Boy visiting a girl's "farm" and she impressing her with her "melons", seriously that's the best you could come up for a gaming site?

4.This ad featuring Delhi daredevils is so unintentionally funny that I couldn't stop myself from laughing every time I see it. Credit to Viru who tried to act his skin out. "Tune to zindagi ki baazi maar li" :)

There are couple more, one in which Fardeen Khan nearly gave his dad a lap dance for Pan Bahar(sadly its not on Youtube anymore) and other being a jet pilot trusting his fighter jet in the sky and somehow relates it to the mobile he uses.
I believe these are not the only ones, add more and if you can't find any, IPL is round the corner, trust it to fetch some really annoying commercials for you.

Edit: The mobile-jet ad is for Lemon mobile. Finally saw the full version. Interestingly the guy first compares the cell to his girlfriend and then to jet. Is there something I am missing? (Link thanks to Abhinav)

A hate letter by a Cigarette

2010-02-24T04:06:00.005+05:30

Dear Quitter,

Remember me? Of course you do! You can't take your eyes off me even now and still you can do nothing. You shameless prick! You have changed but I haven't. This letter is not for you to take me back but to remind you of the good times that you are missing.

I was once the only part of your life when you felt truly relaxed. I was there with you when you were depressed, there when you were celebratory and also there when you had nothing else to do. I was the first thing that you looked for when you woke up and was, most of the time, the last thing you held when you tried to sleep.

I remember the times when you used to say that your mornings were incomplete without me and the times when you walked in the middle of the night to search for me. I tolerated your every mood, even when you bared me and made me into a joint. Still what gave you the happiness, gave me pleasure.

People used to say a lot a stuff about me but it never changed your affection towards me. Not even when I was called a cheap slut who can give you life threatening diseases. I remember you used to say "Its not cheap anymore"

Then things started to change one day, the day when you brought that bitch into your life. I could see just from her expressions, she hated me. She didn't like the fact that I was always closer to your heart. Its not that you didn't try. You tried to patch things between her and me and have a threesome, but some things are just not meant to be. Please inform her that if she doesn't enjoy me, it is not due to some problem with me, it is because she is doing it wrong.

Then started our secret meetings. At that time also I didn't mind being the other person in your life. Sadly, like all other secrets of life, this secret was also disclosed one day. That started the trend of our "one last meetings". You used to hold me like you really believed that you will never hold me again and I also tried to give you full pleasure till I lasted.

Then came the day when we were caught red handed. I was too happy that for once you will face the reality and show some balls, but you caved in.

Its been so many months since then, you have even married that ignorant bitch now! Nowadays whenever you find some other person holding me, I can see the twitch in your eyes but then you seem to show that you have moved on.

You are not the first person that has left me, but unlike many, you have left me not with your will but under pressure from a certain other, whom you knew for just few weeks. For once I hoped that you could have been man enough and told her that leaving me is your decision not hers.

With me gone I always think how do you face your dear friends Peggu and Beeru? Or have you ditched them too? Please if you are planning to leave them too then, for once, be a man and quit by yourself without taking orders from the high command.

Yours lovingly,
Ciggy

Save the IITians - An Airtel Initiative

2010-02-20T23:27:00.003+05:30

In a bid to out wit the rival telecom provider Aircel, Airtel has started the initiative Save the IITians.
Speaking to the media, the Airtel spokesperson said
"It is about creating awareness that IITians, like other living beings, need mates too. Their prime years are wasted looking for their prospective mates in the virtual world"
On asked about whether this initiative is in response to Aircel's Save the Tigers initiative, he said
"No, we are dealing with a bigger cause here. Look there were a million Tigers a century ago and now there are 1000 left. How has our life degraded? Infact our life is better. I bet you couldn't have enjoyed upto 16Mbps speed a century ago on any network."
"Also with 1000 Tigers, they still have 1:3 male female ratio. Look at poor IITians, there is 1:20 male: non male ratio. Lets not even go into the male female ratio category. These guys are the future of the nation. If they don't get prospective mates now, I believe the great IIT gene pool will end for ever"

Its been heard that they have roped in famous cricketers like Rajesh Chauahan and VenkatPati Raju as the brand ambassadors. Airtel hasn't provided any reason for such choice
To create awareness about the horrible situation IITians are living in, plans are on to put flexes around the cities featuring IIT girls in their various moods. Local government has requested to avoid putting such flexes around schools, parks and hospitals so that people with weak heart don't get scared. Permission to put flexes with whole batch of IIT girls is still pending with law enforcement agencies.
Famous social activist, Suheil Seth commented on Times Now, " I believe that this issue deals with whole country and whole world as such and we can not tolerate such inhuman behavior against a certain section of society"
On another question regarding the recent Naxal attacks, Mr. Seth added " I believe that this issue deals with whole country and whole world as such and we can not tolerate such inhuman behavior against a certain section of society"

St. Valentine: May you rot in hell

2010-02-14T00:21:00.001+05:30

St. Valentine, you bastard, I hope that you would have reincarnated as a dung beetle in your next life. Every year fools celebrate your death anniversary and every year we, the lesser mortals, feel more low than we feel on any other day. It was quite justified that you were beheaded. (This info thanks to Sheldon Cooper).

It is not a rant against people loving each other and a certain section (read engineers) being left alone to survive on all the porn that is (and would be) available on net, it is a rant against people choosing one day to symbolize their love. What's with celebrating your love on this ungodly day? It doesn't proves anything but yes what is does is that it singles out guys like me, who want to treat this day as just another day but all the TV channel, all the hype seems to judge me in way that I have STD.

Why do people have to fall into this gimmick of card companies and play into their hands. In my childhood I never heard of Valentine's day. (Of course having Doordarshan as the only entertainment source helped me in not gaining such information which was against our culture). But now it is not just Valentine's day, its a whole fucking week. Somebody texted me that there is actually one day assigned for one, supposedly, romantic gesture throughout the week. FYI if the girl is so loose to fall in the trap of these 7 days, then she is probably not worth spending so much time.

If you seriously like somebody then please spend every day as it is Valentine's day and keep the celebration to yourselves. No need shouting on the rooftop and engaging in PDA. It makes people like me seriously sick.

The Decade Awards

2010-02-09T22:59:00.014+05:30

I know its a bit late for a decade review but who am I kidding, I know no one was waiting for it. So here they are:

Humanitarian of the decade: Ashmit Patel for showing us what we have been dreaming since those cute Liril ad days. Ashmit, you may never win an actual award but you surely have reserved a place in heaven.

Special mention: Mani Shankar for letting us see much more of Nandana Sen than it was expected in a war movie.

Anti-Humanitarian of the decade: Former health minister Ramdas thanks to whom I can't have simple pleasure of smoking and drinking at the same time in a pub.

Special Mention: The guys who banned Savita Bhabhi. May you guys never get an erection

Too much information of the decade: Anil Kapoor for showing his man breast in Tashan.

Special Mention: Shamita Shetty showing why going commando at a public event is not such a good idea.

Fresh face of the decade: Who other than KRK?

Numerous people came and went away (some like Tusshar Kapoor are still lurking somewhere) but this daisy fresh face will remain etched in memories for next 5 decades.

Special Mention: Tusshar Kapoor, Bruce Mcgain, Jaya Sawant (Rakhi ki maa)

Have-Been-There-Since-Ages award: Just like past 200 decades, this decade also the award goes to AK Hangal. To the ignorant, this decade also we were blessed with his undying presence in Lagaan and some random Abhishek Bachhan movie.
Trivia question: Does any body remember any movie in which he played a role of a young college student? The youngest I can remember him is from Bawarchi, where he played role of eldest brother (Obviously who was nearing his retirement age)

Special Mention: Suresh Kalmadi, I am sure when my grand kids will be disqualified for Olympics 2090 trial, it will be because the IOC chairman, Mr Kalmadi was pissed at me.

Overachiever of the decade: Jointly shared by SS Das, Vijay Dahiya, Thiru Kumar, Sarandeep Singh who were lucky enough to share the dressing room with Sachin and Dravid.

Special Mention: RS Sodhi, Rahul Sanghavi, Samir Dighe.

Underachiever of the decade: Bangaroo Lakshman. No he is not younger brother of VVS. He was the president of BJP when he tried to achieve money under the table and was caught in camera.

Special Mention: Hansie Cronje, Azzu miyan.

Award for recognizing homosexuality in mainstream: Harman Baweja for his buddy dialog in Love Story 2050: "This is a hard one, you have a nice one, take care buddy". Watch the video from 4:27 to 4:32 to believe it.

Special Mention
Celina, not for her lesbian gay group but for what she wears(I mean makeup)

Obvious gyan of the decade: Sex dossier by coach Gary.

Special Mention: Sherlyn Chopra telling how going under the knife does no harm to one’s inner most being.

Un-obvious gyan of the decade: Baba Ramdev telling that homosexuality is a disease and he has a cure for it.

Joke of the decade: Arjun Rampal getting National award, that too for acting.

Special Mention: Narender Hirwani saying Ganguly cut short his career in prime. Sunil Joshi getting IPL contract and actually playing couple of games. Sanjay Bangar being bought out by KKR from Deccan Chargers. The whole existence of Ajit Agarkar.

Run Dubey Run

2009-10-25T18:26:00.009+05:30

(Warning: Long Post)

Flight at 6:30, reached airport at 5:45, yeh I am a genius, perfectly optimized timing. Show ticket at the Kingfisher counter, waiting for the boarding pass. 5 minutes pass, worried look on the attendant's face, "Sir, this flight has departed, it was 6:30 AM flight, you are 12 hrs late for boarding !!"

WHATTTTTT!! How can it be, I am such an idiot, FUCK FUCK FUCK !!!

Okay, cool down, "When does your next flight departs"?

"Tomorrow morning, sir"

"..and partner airlines?"

"There is a Spice jet flight, but its boarding gates just closed"

OMG, what should I do now, my train from Delhi to Kanpur is at 11:30 (or is it 11:40, dunno will check later), anyhow I have to reach Delhi before 10:30 . Diwali season, Dhanteras, mindless shopaholic Delhi traffic, will I be able to reach station in an hour?

Still standing at the boarding pass counter, looking every bit constipated. I need a cigarette NOW. No, No not right time, "What about any other airlines?", I ask

"Sir, our ticketing counter will help you regarding it"

"....and....will I get any refund?", I ask hiding all my embarrassment and still looking like a fool,

"Sir, our ticketing counter will help you regarding it"

Are you guys bots, seriously? Whatever, just goto the fucking counter.

"Hi, I have missed my flight for Delhi, is there any other flight in next 1 hr or so?"

"One minute sir"..."Sorry, there is no Kingfisher or Jet flight, but there is one Air India flight departing at 7:20 PM".

"Perfect, ...how much refund will I get for the missed flight?", my nerves are cooling a little bit

"One minute sir"..."Only Rs 200 will be deducted, rest all will be transferred back"

First good news since what felt as ages

Air India counter, seriously ugly faces. Do they want to scare the customers away?

"Do you have any tickets for next Delhi bound flight?"

I am asked to goto one ugly aunty sitting at the right most corner, let's call her aunty no. 1

"Do you have any seats remaining for Delhi bound flight at 7:30 AM?"

Aunty No. 1: "Domestic?"

"Ya"(Although I wanted to say, "No, the flight bound to Delhi, the country!")

Aunty No. 1: "To fir idhar kyo aa gaye, udhar jao na", pointing to the left most corner, to ugly aunty no. 2

"Dilli ka ticket milega abhi wali flight ka?", I assumed my 100% desi version

Aunty No. 2: "Uski sabhi ticket bik gayi hia"

I wonder whether I can sit near to pilot, it has happened before, and mine is a genuine emergency, but I dare not joke now.

"To ab kya?" , I ask

"There is one international flight transiting at Delhi"

"Give me one for that"

"Goto to that corner"

Ohh...back to aunty no.1

"International flight to Delhi, what time does it departs?"

Aunty No. 1: "8:10"

"...will reach Delhi at?"

"Ummm...", aunty counting on fingers, "8:10, 9:10, 10:10, it will reach at 10:10"

"Perfect, give me one"

Aunty goes to swipe my credit card at godknows what location, comes back after 10 minutes, I see the time of arrival at Delhi Airport , 10:30 PM

"WHATTT, you said 10:10 PM!!"

"Arre, its just official arrival time, it always reaches long before that, dont worry beta"

Whatever !!

Goto AirIndia boarding counter

"Sir, this is International ticket, you have to goto International terminal, thats on the right side straight"

Umm, never knew that, whatever !!

Boarding pass line seems easy, just 5 people ahead of me, they have quite some luggage, but how long can it take, I smile after a long time.

45 minutes pass, My goodness, these people are so slow, and why do they have to take that much lugagge? are they being deported? Shifting base from India? I want an AK-47

Finally at the counter, hand over my ticket. 5 minutes pass, person hitting the keyboard like crazy

"From where did you get this ticket sir?"

I snap, "Fucking 50 meters away from your dumbass counter, what happened now?"

"No sir, there is no reservation entry for your name, No problem, I will make one, this is your boarding pass and this is custom's declaration form"

"What customs? I dont know? It says a lot of things, I have a most of them, will they take it from me? Do I have to pay extra?"

"No sir, its just for official purpose"

Whatever !

Customs, Done. Security, Done. Run towards the smoking lounge.

Ohhhhh, sweet lord, NOW I feel good.

Sister calls, tells that she got her dream job, YIPIEE!!

I tell her I have raped myself, YIPIEEE !!

Panic, panic, panic. Girls panic a lot. She tries to induce some panic in me too. I hang up.

Talk to fellow passengers, bad news, this flight NEVER reaches Delhi before 11.

PANIC, PANIC, PANIC. More cigarette.

Call all the cab guys in Delhi, only one books cab for 10:45 from International airport. Okay I say, I have 45 minutes to reach station, certainly possible.

Boarding starts, inside the airbus

OHHHHHHWHATTHEFUCK!! Are these air hostesses for real, who let them out at this age? They should be nursing their grandkids now. Damn you Air India, now I will have nightmares all through my life. One seriously looks like a man trapped in a female costume. Fuck you Indian government for not implementing age and beauty criteria. This is International flight for god's sakes. Sister calls again. Induces more panic. I snap at her too. Hang up again. Tear the boarding pass.

I love you AirIndia, I am at International arrival at 10:30, I can make it to railway station. Have to go through immigration check. What? Okay!

"Boarding pass?"

"Woh to flight me bhool aya", my face as innocent as a sheep

"To wapas jake leke aao"

"Sir please", more innocence

"Okay, aage se mat karna"

Call the cab guy, "Where are you?"

"Sir, I will reach in 15 minutes, booking was for 10:55 na?"

"No, you idiot, dont bother coming now"

Pre-paid taxi

"Bhaiyya 11:30 ki train hai pahucha dege na?"

"Abhi 11 baj raha hai, nahi ho payega"

"Achha chalo to sahi, dekhte hia"

Cab is a vintage Maruti OMNI, driver knows his ways around Delhi. Good.

Should check what time my train departs, its 11:40 yeh, 10 more minutes of oxygen.

Cab is running smoothly, see even Bajaj scooters are overtaking us.

"Bhaiyya thoda tez chalo"

"Tez hi to chala rahe hia, 60 ke oopar kya bhagegi yeh gaadi"

Panic, cigarette, panic

11:37: Traffic signal at Paharganj, I skip out and run. Check on which platform my train is, 13 the board says, Fuck, why didnt I choose the Ajmeri gate. Can do nothing now, run, run. No cant run, okay walk fast. Yes that can be done.

11:41: Yeh I am infront of my compartment. Made it. Legs ache, heart beats fast, I am smiling ear to ear. Finally accomplished something in past 2 years.

Finally the train departed at 12. Never felt so good about a train being late.

Dalaal: A Mithun-Da Classic

2009-09-04T04:48:00.008+05:30

I could never watch this gem of a movie when it was released in 1993. My dad though watched it and I was told that its NOT a movie for kids. After 16 years, now I got chance to visit the earlier forbidden territory and man it was fun.

This is not a regular Mithunda D-grade cinema. It did fairly good business, mostly thanks to the amazingly erotic Gutar Gutar song. The basic premise of the movie is fairly simple. A village bumble, Bhola unknowingly works as a pimp for Jagan (Raj Babbar). His job: To pimp the girl he loves, Roopali. Here the story gets interesting, I thought that Roopali was a pro, but in the end it of the movie it was revealed that she was a virgin (with a price tag of cool 1 million). Now I understand when she was unsupportive of her client (who else but Shakti kapoor), it was not just unprofessionalism.

Story also has a very teen looking Ravi Behal, who is in love with Mithun's sister (whose future in all his movies is same, attempted rape). Infact even Shakti Kapoor, Ravi Behal's father, also tries to rape her but a second later tells her bahu main tumhari raksha karunga. Do hormones act these crazy?

Its not the story that is brilliant, there are very small nuggets that you will remember for your life. Where on the earth would you find Mithun dressed as Subhash Ghai to impress his girl?

While Mithunda was in this get up, he was being chased by traffic cops who wore Navy uniform!! That was innovative!
Also I found out that when producers don't have much budget, they tend to pass their personal cordless phones as police wireless!!
Like the most of late eighties-early nineties movies this movie also informs us that villagers all over India have a lingo which is a simplistic combo of U.P and Bihari lingo. It doesnt matter whether that village was an hour distance from Mumbai, if its a village, it has to have "that" lingo. However if the heroine is from a village, then depending upon her acting credentials, she might or might not speak in the same way as the rest of the villagers. A comcept very well used in this movie.

This movie has it all: A mother who hands gun to her son to kill his characterless father, A timid farmer whose son has gone to city and daughter is kidnapped by goons, A sister who is 16 years old (but looks just about 3 years younger than her mother), A villain who is too strong for 98% of the movie but gives up just at the end. There are too many things to point out. It has everything that was seen in past 2 decades.
For past 16 years I have been thinking that this movie had nudity or some explicit scenes, but like all childhood dreams, this also turned out to be just a dream. Nudity or no nudity, this movie is a must watch if you love to see cliche melodrama.

Kaminey: Good but Great??

2009-08-17T10:28:00.003+05:30

This is one bad thing about going to see a good movie 2-3 days after being release. You go with so much expectations that the road is only downhill from there. It definitely doesnt means that Kaminey is in any way a bad unwatchable product, but it is definitely NOT that great as it is being made out of. Even the great Taran Adarsh also gave the film a 4 star rating(on a side note, is he really a reviewer or just a trade analyst?) So why would a lesser mortal, like me, felt unsatisfied?

1. It is NOT a hatke movie. It is not to say that only "different" cinema is the good cinema but once you have heard so much about a movie, you are bound to expect that this movie would be different. Nops
2.The length. Simply put, many times during the movie I was bored.

I can only think of two negative points, see the movie IS good but damn you reviewers, you have killed such a good movie for me. Had I thought that this was just another movie, I would have come back infinitely more satisfied than I am now.

Btw all those reviewers who said so many good words about the non-linearity of the movie, can you please enlighten me where the hell it was?

Why Shiney Why?

2009-06-16T22:09:00.006+05:30

Now it is proved that the underage maid was sexually assualted, the question now arises how frustrated a good looking man should be to do it? Shiney, for god's sake you are a bollywood actor, there are numerous struggling actors out there, go be a Shakti Kapoor and offer them some "roles".

I can understand a guy like Tusshar Kapoor not getting even a maid but Shiney you!!!!. Just compare your pic to his:

I still can not fathom how frustrated a man could be when he rapes a maid. Mind it this is coming from an IITian and undoubtebly we are crème de la crème of the frustrated lot.

Shiney you are worse than Shakti Kapoor!!

WTF from ICC

2009-06-16T01:09:00.003+05:30

Finally I am back after a long hiatus and why not after such a big big bang from India in the world cup. But wait isnt it the good thing that India wont be winning this world cup because had they won, they would have been world champs for just 9 months. Yes thats the biggest wtf from ICC. The next T20 WC is in April 2010 in the Caribbean. So next time India goes to the WC, they dont have the pressure of being the "favorites" or the defending champs, they can again play the fearless cricket they had been playing since past two years.
In the meanwhile, ICC has more wtfs coming:

1. Champions trophy (50 overs): Sept 2009
2. India touring to Bangladesh: Nearly whole of 2009
3. India touring to WI: Whatever is remaining of 2009
4. Australia touring India: For freakking 7 ODIs and NO test.

That means we will be playing tests against Chinchpokli XI for whole of the year (Yeah!! whatever remains after Champions Trophy, Champions League, Modi's kitty parties etc.) but we would not be playing test against top teams. And they say that spectators are losing interests in the Tests. WTF

For the entire foolish Future Tour Programs visit:
http://in.yimg.com/icccricket/pdfs/ftp_2006-2012.pdf

Rab Ne Bana Di Movie

2008-12-26T20:09:00.001+05:30

Don't be confused by the title of the post, I have selected this after much thought and it's very much relevant with the movie Rab Ne Bana Di Jodi. Well if you pull rab out of the movie there is nothing left. Like the leading characters in his film, Aditya Chopra would have also thought that Rab sab theek kar denge. Well God helps those, who help themselves. In this case God doesn't seem to be helping Adi, because you don't expect an almost empty theater in the second weekend after release of a SRK movie. Is there a decline in SRK's popularity or Rab nahi chahte ki Aditya Chopra aur movies banaye.

By now everybody knows the story so I would not waste words in telling you the same. It could have been a brilliant film if Rab was not to decide everything, somethings could have been left on Bobby, played by Vinay Pathak. Whenever there is a difficult situation Adi looks up to Rab for help. Well Rab has given you a brain so that you can help yourself sometime. Not to take the credit away, some scenes are really beautiful and I enjoyed them and had a good laugh on some of them. The only problem I have is with the over dramatic scenes, which seems to have become a trademark of each YRF film and may be the whole country agrees with me, which explains the 100 crore loss, which is being talked about these days.

I always knew SRK can act, you have to just let him not be himself in the movie and I have again been proved right after watching him as Surinder Sahani. Surinder Sahani, Panjab Power, lighting up your life ji, this dialogue is enough to light up your faces, when they are spoken by Suri, not by SRK. On the other hand Hum Hain Rahi Pyar Ke Phir Milenge Chalte Chalte, really irritated me. That's one irritating way to say bye. They should have put a disclaimer "never try this at home", whenever this dialogue was being spoken.

It would have been a nice film and I would have liked it better if it was 20 minutes shorter. While I enjoyed the first half in pieces, second half didn't seem to end. While SRK is good as Suri, he irritates as Raj*. Anushka Shrama has done a good job. Special mention for Vinay Pathak for his special role. Rab has also done a brilliant job by entering on his convenience wherever he felt like and making the movie more predictable. If you are an SRK fan, you would like this movie, if you are not go and watch Suri.

*Raj is played by a well known celebrity, please do not try these tactics to woo girls in your colony. In case you get slapped, beaten or caught by Police, the producers of Rab Ne Bana Di Jodi can not be held responsible.

Wah Aamir Wah!!

2008-06-07T22:30:00.002+05:30

It seems perfection is associated with the name Aamir (okay lets forget the rash Paki opener Aamri Soheil). This movie is simply perfect. I couldnt find any flaw even after spending one night think about the movie. Its just the perfect thriller India has ever produced. Ekdum hollywood estyle picture hai baap!
The story starts with a wonderfull casting song and some nicely taken shots of Mumbai. And then one great scene starts following another. Unfortunately I can not tell any more about the story, it will spoil every thing but surely some extremely splendid scenes can be discussed.
1. Small Victory Scene: This scene comes up when everything is going wrong in Aamir's life. The way he beats up those thugs is awesome and the audience also feel like kicking their asses. This scene is enhanced by the beautiful Qwalli which goes on in the background. When the scene end I felt like clapping for the person "Aamir" , he seemd so real!
2. Realization Scene: This best part of the scene is just for a second when Aamir realises what has actually happend to him. This time I felt like clapping for Rajeev Khandelwal, the actor this time. His emotions are simply outstanding.
Actually there are many more such scenes like when Aamir goes to the public sandaas, the power of the scene is so much that the audience also feels like pukinh when Aamir does. As I am trying to remember such scenes, the more scenes are cropping up in my mind, but such aalsi I am, I can't describe any more scenes.
The direction of the debutant RK Gupta is awesome, infact awesome is also an understatement. My vocabulary is too small to describe the art of this man. The cinematography by Alphonse Roy is out of the world stuff. The OST of the movie is brilliant and I wonder why such beautifull songs were not promoted. Seriously bad marketing of such a good product. Editing is perfect, the movie never drags and it ends exactly when it had to end. Total 1 and a half hour paisa wasool. Finally some words for the splendid actor, Mr. Khandelwal. He, along with the director, deserve standing ovation whereever they go. Rajeev could have done atleast a dozen TV soaps uptill now and could have married 19 times but he chose to be a part of this movie. I hope a certain Ms. Kapoor is watching this movie and think of funding these kind of movies, not the ones in which her brother plays a dreading don.
This movie is a must watch and that too ONLY in theaters coz the only thing that I found disappointing was the 3 quarter empty cinema hall.

One, Two, Blah Blah

2008-03-30T18:27:00.002+05:30

Finally I am back to blogging after loooong. Thnx Smokerjoe for keeping my blog uptodate. Khair coming to the point, One two three is NOT worth wasting your money in a multiplex but if you are a chiller party like yours truly and dont mind the single theater charm then this movie is a must watch!! (BTW I watched it thanx to the piracy, not much single theaters in Gurgaon). This movie is about three idiots named Lakshminarayan and the usual Priyadarshan type confusion that occurs. The plot ends here, yes there's nothing more to write about the plot instead the director Ashwini Dhir needs some mention. It seemed the final output was far from what he wanted to show. I believe it because of the fact that this is the same man who gave us Office Office. The glimpses of such artist is seen in the scenes between Manoj Tiwari's gang and Anna Shetty. Special mention to ever underrated Sanjay Mishra (As Pintos) who does a Jeevan impersonation brilliantly. If I had to pick two performs of this dim wit movie, then they have to be Manoj tiwari and Sanjay Mishra. Rest all are plain and simple BAD. Yes to add to misery of the viewer, Upen Patel and Tannissa (or whatever her name is) are also there in a role which would have been rejected by umpteen junior artists. Apart from few genuine moments, this movie is full of double meaning jokes and corny dialogs. Whatelse we could have expected from a movie which had a leading character as a lingerie supplier. Background score is also a minus point, the behan de takke track which keeps on playing during Anna's scenes is simply irritating. Music is poor, cinematography poorer but a good comedy need not have these two things still it can be successful but this movie isnt good comedy either.
Now coming to the point why this movie can be enjoyed in single theater cinema halls. Firstly in that sort of ambiance, you will certainly laugh on 80% of the gags in the movie. Afterall its jokes are better than Anil Kapoor jokes in Race, which is running to packed houses. Secondly when the ticket costs you just 40 bucks then you dont mind sitting through any movie :D.
I am still hopefull for Ashwini Dhir and his second outing as writer, Krazzy 4. In One two three it seems he wanted to make an Andaz Apna Apna but ended up making a Priyadarshan remake instead.

Mithya: treat yourself, 2008 for bollywood has started

2008-02-09T12:04:00.000+05:30

Finally the year 2008 has started for bollywood. All other movies released before this one in 2008 were not up to the mark and somehow failed to impress. I was waiting for this film since I read about it about four months back. And after watching the film I am glad that I watched this film. My friend was really hesitant about going for this movie (he was insisting on watching Fool's Gold) and I persuaded him and I am glad the movie did not disappoint me. After Mixed Doubles and Bheja Fry, Rajat Kapoor, Ranveer Shorey and Vinay Pathak trio has again done wonders. Rajat was not acting this time and was more keen on making other act.

The movie is about the life of a struggling actor VK (Ranveer), who finds himself in the middle of a gang war just because of his looks. This movie has a lot of twists and it will be unfair on my part to give away those here. In one line, the film is story of a guy who finds himself at the wrong place in the wrong time and how that changes his life. Although the movie is not a remake of Don, but this is how a Don remake could have been.

Rajat Kapoor and Saurabh Shukla have come up with a brilliant script, which is very unpredictable. Although I somehow knew the end, but the way movie reaches it's end is worth watching. The story has comedy, drama, action, romance, love, almost every element of a good script. Arindam Chaudhary has made up for his mistake (Rok Sako to Rok Lo) by producing this film. Rajat Kapoor has presented this brilliant script beautifully.

If we talk about acting, everyone in the cast has played his part beautifully. Ranveer Shorey has performed really well in a very demanding role. Vinay Pathak leaves his mark in a small but significant role. Other actors Naseeruddin Shan, Saurabh Shukla, Iravati, Brijendra Kala, Harsh Chhaya all are good in their part and have been suitably cast. Neha Dhupia has proved that she can act, if she is given good roles. By the end of the year, this movie will definitely find it's name among one of the best movies of year 2008.

I would rate this film as 8 out of 10 and would recommend every cinema lover to go and watch this film. I am sure you will be glad that you watched this film.

Taare Zameen Par

2007-12-24T02:28:00.001+05:30

When something is done with heart, it shows. Like everyone else I was also waiting to see Aamir Khan, the Director, since he has already proved himself as an actor and a producer. So it was obvious to have high expectations from the film. The promotions being aired on TV made it clear that it's different and it added even more to the expectations. Finally, after watching the film I can't stop myself from admiring the Director in Aamir Khan.

The film got a lot of media attention when it was being made. The film was supposed to be directed by Amol Gupte, writer of the film. Aamir was criticized by some people for taking Amol's film away, but I think Amol should be happy with the way the film has turned up. Amol would have also thought that Aamir is giving a better shape to the mold he has cast and probably that is the reason he has let Aamir direct the film. By the way, I don't think any other film star of recent times would have backed this idea, but Aamir did (that could be another reason for Amol to stick with Aamir) and has pulled it of well.

The movie revolves around one dyslexic child Ishan (Darsheel Safary) but it is not about dyslexia. Ishan represents every child who is trying to survive in this competitive world. No body wants to have an underachiever in his/her family and when parents think their child might remain an underachiever, they be hard on him without understanding what child actually wants and sometimes the child is not able to survive the hardness. Every parent can relate with Ishan's parents. When 8 year old Ishan is not able to perform up to the expectations in his school, his parents decide to send him to boarding. There also Ishan is not able to survive the curse of being an underachiever and he even stops doing what he used to love, painting. He is noticed by an unconventional art teacher Nikumbh (Aamir) and Nikumbh decides to take care of that boy and presents a different, more confident and talented Ishan to this world and to Ishan's parents. How he does that is worth a watch.

Entire movie belongs to Darsheel and the boy have done a brilliant job. The boy is so good that you don't even realize that Aamir Khan is missing for the entire first half. Second half is a bit slow, but it is bound to happen with this script. Aamir Khan, the actor is good as usual. Direction is first grade, and the way Aamir has pulled of such a difficult subject, hats off to him. All the songs have been picturised very well and help the story. Thanks to Prasoon Joshi for beautiful lyrics. Music is refreshing. Over and above everything, this movie is with a message. This movie should be watched by every teacher and parents to learn how to deal with children. They should not be treated as machines, all they need is love and care.

I would rate this movie as 8 out of 10. A must watch.

Khoya Khoya Chand

2007-12-15T00:30:00.001+05:30

Some wise man said sometime back, "Never bite more than you can chew." Sudhir Mishra probably did not hear of this, otherwise his film could have been a masterpiece. It could even qualify for screenings in film academies for teaching students about film making during 50s and 60s. The film actually takes you that era with ease. The only problem with this film is that the director has tried to show too much. He has actually tried to cover entire film industry of 50s and 60s with the help of 5-6 lead characters, which I think is very difficult. He actually succeeds, but in pieces.

The story revolves around Zafar (a budding author/scriptwriter turned director), Nikhat (struggling actress turned star), Prem Kumar (super star), Khosa (producer), Ratnabala (star), Shyamal (AD turned star secretary turned producer), Noni Da (director) and Ravinder (rising star). The whole story revolves around all these characters. I actually got confused, if it was primarily the story of entire film industry or about Zafar and Nikhat. The director has shown all the possible combinations of relationships between the lead characters Zafar, Nikhat and Prem Kumar. At some point of time it starts becoming so complicated that you actually get confused that what these guys really want. The story starts with Nikhat meeting Prem Kumar, and Prem Kumar helping her in her career. During shooting of a film, Nikhat meets Jafar and both fall for each other. But for Nikhat's career it's important to stay with Prem Kumar. Finally they both decide to marry but they don't, again it's career or something else, you don't clearly understand. Nikhat is not able to do Zafar's first directorial venture, and Zafar is not able to handle this fact. He does his movie with Ratnabala and the movie is a flop. Heartbroken Zafar disappears from Mumbai. He comes back again and makes the best movie of his and Nikhat's filmy career "Khoya Khoya Chand", which is actually based on real life story of Zafar.

The movie actually takes you to the 50's thanks to the way it is shot and the set design. All the actors have done good job. Shiney Ahuja has to really learn how to act in sad scenes. Soha Ali Khan looks cute. Editor has probably done overtime for this movie, because the scenes seem to end and start abruptly some times. Some dialogs are really witty like the scene when Prem Kumar finds out about Zafar and Nikhat's relationship. The scene I liked most was where Nikhat and Zafar throw stones at the Producer's house, whom she met at the age of 14. The direction sometimes lack the old Sudhir Mishra of Is Raat Ki Subah Nahi and Hazaaron Khwahishein Aisi. The story could also have been more gripping, if they would have concentrated on one of the relationships and tried to make it less complicated for the audience. Music is really good and I liked all the songs. Shantanu Moitra-Swanand Kirkire combination does it again. Overall I would rate this movie as 5 out of 10.

Mr. Gupta & his gang of losers

2007-12-09T14:27:00.000+05:30

Mr. Gupta is here again along with the same set of his friends and to embarrass some actors of high caliber, he has made them a part of his loser subset. Afterall what could one have expected of a movie which calls its six directors a "visionary" who actually are below average at the best. Yes the mistake was made even before the movie came into the picture. Its the producer who has to be blamed for the poor show. Can he please tell me why the texture of the screen is coarse akin to hollywood movie? Yes it looked good in Kaante but its like playing Akhtar and Kaneria with same technique. (BTW their performance nowadays deserves one individual post altogether). Second question is why u have such fascination for unnecessary close up shots, that too of the male lead! Thirdly if you are "daring" to make a movie like 10 Kahaniyaan, then please show some respect towards the audience's IQ, you dont need to explain every thing that happened in the story. Audience is not as dumb as you thought us to be.( Yes I have been dumb enough to watch all of your last offerings). All the stories barring 1-2 dont leave any aftertaste, if not bitter. Frankly I have to google now to find out which stories I watched last night.
Since I have opened the official website the movie now and I can see the names of stories, so lets talk about each of them

Matrimony (Dir. Sanjay Gupta): This story deals with a wife cheating on husband with a twist in the end. As soon as I was into the second minute of the stories I realized that I saw it on DD during good old DD days when they used to make adaptation of short stories. A friend of mine then confirmed that he has read the story somewhere. Acting wise OKAY. Direction wise below average.

High on Highway(Dir. Hansal Mehta): Story bad, acting pathetic, direction leading to nowhere. Period.

Pooranmashi (Dir. Meghna Gulzar): This story deals with how situations can lead you to sabotage life of the person you love the most. As soon as the first scene appeared, it was apparent that this story is directed by Chhoti Gulzar. Some good background music, very less dialogs. Nice acting. Better Direction. See Mr. Gupta making short story is kind of easy.

Strangers in Dark (Dir. Sanjay Gupta): This story apparently tells about one horny night of Neha Dhupia, who btw was once not bad. All good but in the end the director messes up all the good work by trying to explain everything. Junta ko kya ekdum *@#$%^ samjhte ho bhidu?

Lovedale (Dir. Jasmeet Dhodi): Story of how once Yash Chopra met Ramgopal Varma. This story is so badly acted that you wonder how bad can you act withing 10 minutes. Scenes between Neha Oberoi and Ajit Agarkar of bollywood, Aftab create such an aura of bad acting that it seems impossible to remember what does the word acting means. The less said about the direction, the better.

Sex on the beach (Dir. Apoorva Lakhiya): The Sanjay Gupta award for worst acted, directed, conceptualized story goes to this one. Now there are four reasons why Apoorva should not be allowed to even think about film making, even ban his coming on the sets too. (The other three reasons are Shootout, Ek Ajnabee and Mumbai se aya mera dost). The story is predictable form the word go, the actress (Tareena Patel) seems just out of a Mallu soft porn. And yes, there was spook too, quite Ramsay style. Now i figured out, the actress was the new age Ramsay heroine!
Dino's role was simple, try to be funny at first, then be spooked yet this actor impresses me by failing to do both.

Rice Plate (Dir. Rohit Roy): This debutnt director gave one decent story which was acted averagely by Shabana and Naseer. The direction seems above average and every other thing seems good untill the last minute when the director tries to explain the scenes. I believe that his producer must have told him to do so.

Zahir (Dir. Sanjay Gupta): This story stands out not because it is brilliant but at least for once we are taken as intelligent people and the director doesnt explain the story to us. Story of rejection of Manoj Bajpai by the hands of a bar dancer. Manoj bajpai overacts, Dia has little scope. Direction is better.

Gubbare (Dir. Sanjay Gupta): Simple story which has ability to take you back to star bestseller days but somewhere something seems missing. Yes, Nana is brilliant.

Rise & Fall (Dir. Sanjay Gupta): I waited for this story because I wanted to see what does Mr Gupta do yet again with Sanju baba and Anna. Big Big disappointment. The story had two major points where it could have scored, the confrontation between Anna and Baba, and the action. The confrontation seems thakela, even regular Anna-giri was missing, Sanju baba looked too disinterested to do the role. The action sequence seemes straight out of Marix 3, without the proper budgeting but ofcourse.

One advice Mr. Gupta, next time onwards please watch Star Bestseller or Old DD short stories before making any such movie( which i doubt you will). Those stories did not have much budget and star value but there were actors and directors.

Talking about the less talked about.

2007-10-31T17:28:00.000+05:30

I have been reading about movies like RGV ki Aag, LCMD, JBJ etc all over internet (I have also been participating in the discussions in some blogs) and felt bad about movies, which people either chose not to watch or not to talk about, although they are better work of art and far more entertaining than all the films mentioned above and many others being discussed around. There are movies I watched in recent past and really liked them, but when I ask my friends about those movies, they seems to either not have heard of the movie or chose not to watch it, because they were made by some not so famous people and lacked good promotions (may be because of budget restrictions). Here I am listing some of these films, which I think deserved better fate at box office.

Haasil (2003) *ing: Irfan, Jimmy Shergil, Hrishita Bhatt, Ashutosh Rana
Written and directed by first time director Tigmanshu Dhulia, this movie is one of my all time favorite, I have watched it more than 20 times already and I can watch it infinite times without getting bored of it. The movie is a love story in the background of UP college politics. You get to see great acting from Irfan and Ashutosh Rana. The dialogues are so good that we even repeat them in our day today conversations. The language is exactly the same as being used in UP and dialogue delivery by actors is top class. The story is well researched and gripping.
This is one movie I would rate 9 out of 10. I wish Tigmanshu makes many more such movies.

Sehar (2005) *ing: Arshad Warsi, Sushant Singh, Pankaj Kapoor
Written and directed by Kabeer Kaushik (has anyone heard of him ever, what is he up to these days), this movie is one of the best Hindi movies released in 2005. The movie is based on the story of Lucknow STF (Special Task Force) in pursuit of UP railway mafia. This is one of the very few movies showing the Police business in great details and the difficulties faced by them in tracking down and eliminating the criminals. You get to see great performances by Pankaj Kapoor and Sushant Singh. I still can't forget the seen where Pankaj Kapoor's gun hating professor character picks up a gun and shoots Sushant Singh. Today's actors should learn some things from this great performer.
The movie has been made with very limited budget and probably makers of the film did not have enough money to promote it well. It hurts when such movies get unnoticed. Hope someday big banner and stars start supporting such efforts.

There are many other movies in the same category like Manorama SFU, Dil Dosti etc, Johnny Gaddar, Maqbool and many more. I wish after reading this post people go and watch these movies and support these talented film makers in serving the Hindi film industry to the extent they are capable of.

signing off, with best wishes to the talented budding film makers of bollywood and hope they get the support they need from industry and audience.

No Smoking

2007-10-27T11:56:00.000+05:30

Respect absurdity, thats what the T-shirt of Mr. Kashyap said while he was in Rome for his movie's preview.( Source: http://passionforcinema.com/tomo-or-is-it-today/). That post itself hinted that this movie may look like an absurd piece of art to many lesser mortals like yours truly. After watching this movie I changed my view. This movie is, in fact, an abstract piece of art which many of us (again including me) can never understand. Therefore I am not in a position to say that this movie is good, bad, watchable, intolerable, blah blah blah. I can only say what I expected of this movie and what I felt after that. For me cinema is not at all about three Es as pointed out by one of the critics. For me a good movie is one where I am glued to the screen and anticipate what is coming next, also that movie should be such that atleast I can understand what the hell is going on the screen. No Smoking scores on one of this category and fails on the other front. I was glued to the screen till the end credits rolled, infact till when Bipasha(why Anurag, why an item number??) came but was I completely understanding the shit? NO. Coming back to the point that what I expected No smoking would be like, I expected it to be somewhat like Fight Club (Not the crappy bollywood version). I dont know in what genre Fight club falls , but surely I understood it and loved it. No smoking appeared to me somewhat like Fight club except for the fact that I couldnt understand quite a few things of the movie. I have utmost respect for Anurag Kashyap (who wouldnt have for the writer of Stya and Shool, not to forget Black Friday), I respect his guts to challenge the system and dare to dream differently but SO MUCH different that even common junta cant relate to it. This movie looks like an ego trip of the director himself (Something like the lead protagonist, K). The director tries to bring out such a niche product that it appears alien to most of us. Why such a talented director tries to appeal only a handful of audience?
Coming to the movie, the first half is fastly paced with some witty humor and good dialogs. Till the interval came, I was wondering what is going on in the movie. Still I was glued to the screen. After 30-45 minutes of the second half I gave up trying to understand what was going on the screen. I was not surprised to see that 99% of the nearly full hall felt the same way.
The pace of movie is simply awesome. The acting is topnotch. Only a director of Anurag's caliber could have made John act this way (in fact the word act is sufficient enough). Supporting cast is fabulous with an exception of bloated Ms. Takia( sometimes I wonder what's she eating nowadays). Editing is crisp. Music is mind blowing. One question Mr. Producer that why you have not promoted the best track of the album, Kash Laga. Its video is worth many viewings and I am looking forward to youtube for providing me the services :). It appears that everything about the movie is great, still one feels that something was still missing. I am seriously thinking about watching this movie again coz I think that a movie about which I have been thinking since past 3-4 days deserves a second watch.(Will I have enough money to watch it, is another question though). Anyways, this movie is worth viewing, once atleast due to the sole reason that its different.

PS. It took me 4 days to complete this post, afterall I couldn't understand the movie(yes thats one of the reasons I am planning to watch it again )

Trip to Rishikesh/Haridwar in Pics

2007-10-18T23:17:00.000+05:30

Finally after fighting with evening Delhi traffic today, we managed to get one card reader and so here are the pics:

The first one at the Petrol pump

A Ganesh Tempo: Read what's written on it(if possible!!)

Read what's written

Only place in India where they serve Cold Diks :P

Daddy Saluja

Zu showing his wounds
That's something which everybody should follow, Gultis included

That's not labour pain!!

Coffee Shack of IIT R

Har-Ki-Pauri

Har-ki-pauri

Ram Jhoola - Rishikesh

The ghat at Rishikesh where we took bath

The history of Lakshman jhoola

Lakshman Jhoola

Me n Zu on Lakshman Jhoola

The best pic came nearly towards the end of the journey, have a look, it is quite self explanatory :)

There are many more but cant post them due to time constraints.

Hopefully will upload them somewhere else.

Road Trip to Rishikesh

2007-10-17T17:02:00.000+05:30

This posts comes so late because I was waiting for the pics to come, but thanx to Saluja's Baba Adam ka Cam, the pics still aren’t here. Khair, after a lot of searching for the shortest route map to Haridwar, we followed the route inside Saluja's mind. MapmyIndia gave us a step by step route, infact a 36 step route, 35 of which told us the route to cross delhi and the 36th one covered the entire route after that!! I was on a 5 year old Pulsar with no mudgaurad while Saluja n Zu were on Saluja’s 4 year old Pulsar, which looks even older than the Mohammed. Riding bike in UP is fun if you enjoy two way traffic in each lane of a two lane road. Jisnme UP me bike chala li woh kahi bhi bike chala sakta hai. The road between Modinagar and Khatauli certainly can NOT be called a highway. The traffic isn’t better either. Journey was going just fine uptill Zutty's black powers came into effect. Nowadays Zu's power have increased so much that the only person to get hurt from them is Zu himself. Driving behind a bus whose petrol tank is leaking is never recommended. That too driving with Zu, NEVER!! The result, Saluja came out scratchless, with Zu having wounds on his right leg and hand, with a not-so-stylish-torn jeans. After marham-patti of Zu we spotted IIT Roorkee and Saluja insisted that we should atleast see it once. One important thing, Babe quotient of IIT Roorkee is higher than what most of IIT guys imagine. We didn’t see much of IIT R but still managed to spend few hours at their Coffe-Shack (dunno what those guys call it there). It is more spacious than IIT Bombay’s shack, but our shack is cooler :D
Haridwar is 30 kms from Roorkee, so after nearly 8 hours of journey we entered the DevBhoomi. We rested for quite a while at Saluja’s relative’s and then planned to explore the city and also look for water rafting opportunities at Rishikesh. The timings of the water rafting did not go with our schedule (yes sometimes we make schedules too!!), so we ditched the plan for this time. Next time surely I am going only for water rafting in that chilling cold water.
Haridwar is different from all the cities that I have visited in past. The visit to Har-ki-Pauri(the most visited ghat of the city) gives you a feeling which is very difficult to describe in words. Since it was cold in the evening and the water of Ganga was very cold, we decided upfront that we will not go in the water but just looking at the enthu of junta overthere, our man in bandages, Zu said that he wanted to go in. Finally me and Saluja took dips in water with me trying to flow with water (no not trying to swim, just flowing). We arranged some plastic sheets to cover Zu’s bandages and Zu also joined us. We took some pictures of Zu changing on the Ghat, hopefully I will post them with Zu’s permission. BTW, when Zu was sitting on Ghat showing all his bandages, some kids showed real pity on him and probably would have given him some money. That would have been fun :)
We took off for Rishikesh the next morning after a good 8 hour sleep. Rishikesh is the place to go on bike only. The lanes are narrow, the place is hilly, even the bridge made for jeep transfers, the Lakshman Jhoola, is narrow. Wonder what kind of jeeps used to pass on that bridge at that point of time (in 20’s and 30’s). The ghats there are somewhat like beaches but more beautiful. Sand is smoother, environment is serene (am I sounding like a girl? Whatever!). Second good thing about this place is that here, unlike Haridwar, you can spot some really good looking firang babes :D. We (Saluja n me) took bath in the holy Ganga, while Zu guarded our belongings. Note: If you find water of Haridwar cold, then watch out for Rishikesh, it is really feet numbing. (Probably that may be one of the reason why Zu didn’t take a dip.) We then took a quick lunch at the German Café where probably we were the only Indians apart from the shopkeeper who was busy flirting with firang babes.
While returning the highway didn’t seem as bad as it had appeared earlier although the journey seemed very long, may be our tired bodies were making it seem longer.
Still this post looks incomplete without the pics that we took, damn you Saluja again. Hopefully the next post will contain the pics coz we took some really interesting pics of some awesome advertisement hoardings on our way to Haridwar.

Wait till then.

Surf Excel Hai Na

2007-10-14T23:16:00.000+05:30

"Agar kuchh accha karne me daag lag jate hain, to daag acche hain." (borrowed from "Daag Acche Hain" campaign of Surf Excel) should have been the concluding line of the movie. That was the only conclusion after watching 3 hour long ad campaign, unfortunately the product YRF chose to endorse was Lux , not Surf. I am not sure how many women across India will buy Lux, if they come to know that they will look like Konkana SenSharma (no offense, she is a great actor, but that's not the face someone would choose to model for a beauty soap) after using this beauty soap.

Oops, I dragged a bit from the objective. Well, the movie is about two young girls Vibhavari (Rani) and Shubhavari (Konkana), living in Banaras with their parents (Anupam Kher and Jaya Bacchan).The movie starts with introducing the two sisters with a song "hum to aise hain bhaiya". What am I doing? Doesn't everyone already know the story. Will summarize for the ignorant ones. To financially support her family the elder sister becomes a high profile escort serving to 5 star clients staying in 5 star hotels in Mumbai. (is entering this highly competitive business that easy?)

I learned one thing about female oriented films, i.e. all the male characters in such movies are either losers (Anupam Kher), haramkhor (Sushant Singh, Tinu Anand, Harsh Chhaya) or not important (Abhishek Bacchan, Kunal Kapoor). Konkana has acted beautifully in a role, which is suffering from a decease called weak characterization. Her character is so dumb that she is never aware of the financial condition of the family, even though she was living in the same home. (yaar kisi hostel me hi rakh dete use) This in not the only thing, there are so many weak spots in the movie and the biggest one is the story. The story has been used so many times in our movies and in so many forms that everyone knew about the next scene before it even played on screen. Couldn't understand the blackmailing angle. Why have irrelevant scenes in the movie just to enhance the plight of the lead character? (ek ladki ke galat decision ko justify karne ke liye kitne logon ko bura dikhaoge) Some props are so out of place that you start wondering, what was in director's mind when he decided to use such props. Like the telephone booth in front of CST station, the phone in that telephone booth (it was not one rupee coin one, may be Indian Telcos have decided to provide free calling facility for girls under distress), the old phone with round dialer in a Mumbai flat (who uses those, unless someone is interested in antiques).

This time Sarkar fails big time in telling the story or is that YashRaj effect. You can see the parineeta director only when the story stays in Banaras, once it reaches Mumbai, the director is lost. Except for the first and last songs all other are forced into the story. In the end, don't watch this film and apni chunari me daag lagne se bacha lo.

Lions of Punjab Presents

2007-10-02T23:55:00.000+05:30

What a coincidence. After Dubeyji's take on the talent hunt shows, here I am writing about a movie which is about such shows. When the background of the movie is talent hunt shows, the movie has to be funny and yes, it is funny.

The movie is all about a talent hunt in USA, "Desi Idol" organized by "Lions of Punjab" and managed by "Bokade Event Management Company". The participants are 17 year old Priti Patel (Who comes for the contest accompanied by her entire family, they have really funny way of speaking English and have really funny habits), Sania Rehman (An aspiring Indian actress, who doesn't know Hindi but pretends to know the same. Which again leads to some interesting turn in the movie), Rrita Kapoor (Who is participating in the contest, so that she can win the prize money and donate the same to her fund raiser. Oh, don't doubt her to be very kind hearted. She is doing it just because Bubbles has done something similar and she wants to do it bigger and better than her), Joshua Cohen (Who is participating just because her girlfriend wants that. Only two Hindi songs he knows are "Bombay Meri Jaan" and "Jana Gana Man"). Well there are other characters also and they keep on adding to the funny element.

The whole movie is about the contest and how each one tries to win the same. Every scene has something funny and makes you laugh. The movie doesn't qualify as a great piece of art but it makes you laugh.

Of Talent Hunts and the Audience

2007-10-02T02:47:00.000+05:30

No No this post does not deals with what most of the junta thinks about these talent hunts. I believe that except auntyjees, their poor uncle jees, some frustrated girls (who can cheer for Prashant Tamang for gods sake) and berozgaar youth, nobody really likes to watch most of the talent hunts that do rounds on their TV screen. I too watch them but seriously there's nothing else to watch during weekends. Okay Okay I went tangent to what i wanted to say. I am not angry at the channel for showing such kind of rape of music but i am amazed at the studio audience who come for every trashy show and wave their hands like they are watching Euro Cup final. Serioulsly who are these losers? They seem to like each and every song that is sung in the most cacophonic way and yet they demand ONCE MORE ONCE MORE. Guys have you sold the last smidgen of self respect that you could have saved for future?
What do these studio audience get for shamelessly shredding off their izzat on screen? According to my sources, they just get lunch packets (sometime even a chance to be on TV is more fulfilling). They all follow similar routine, cheer for every guy/gal sining on stage, laugh on every lame joke that anchor makes and to top it all look all very serious and concerned when one of the fake fights between the judges is taking place. More constructive way of killing your time is measuring how big spit-bubble you can make (Its interesting game though, trust me!!).
I had same reservations about the studio audience of FRIENDS too. Why they had to say "AAAAAWWWWEEEEEEEEE" every time a true romantic scene takes place on the screen? Why Why Why thats wht i said each time Chandler kissed Monica.
Why cant be the studio audience more self respecting and not follow whatever crap the director is yelling? Now thats insane coz then they will no longer be a studio audience, they will be TV audience just like my mummyji, mausi ji, mamaji who cheer for 70% contestants of 90% talent hunts that are being aired.
One day I'll produce a show in which TV audience will firstly be sitting like they used to sit in Lord's in 70's. Secondly they will be allowed to behave like angry Indian fan at Eden garden who has just seen India lose to SriLanka in WC semis. I want to see one person from audience who vents out his true feelings on looking at a contestant brutally raping a Rafi number and paying homage to Sonu Nigam instead. I know my post is not making any sense anymore(that happens during wee hours of the morning), so keeping my further frustrations to myself only.

Dil Dosti etc

2007-10-01T14:34:00.000+05:30

Wah Tiwary ji! kya movie banayi hai. Maza aa gaya. Aapne meri bhi hat trick karwa di (last three movies I have seen are brilliant)

The movie is about two students Sanjay Mishra (Shreyash Talpade) and Apurva (Immad). Sanjay is a student politician, who is from Bihar and knows what he wants in life. Apurva is a rich guy, trying to enjoy life by buying sex and flirting with girls. Sanjay is going for the post of college President. He falls in love with future supermodel Prerna. Apurva, when challenged by Sanjay starts looking for love. The whole story revolves around these two characters, while showing the delhi college life to some extent (that is not the motive of the movie).

Shreyash Talpade has done a brilliant job. Immad needs to work on his acting, may be he can take some tips from his very talented father. The direction is great. Background of the movie is DU, and I was expecting Haasil, but the movie does not disappoint. Still Haasil remains the best bollywood movie about college politics in my books.

After a long time I have seen a movie, which has made me think. I was quite (which is very rare) for sometime after watching this flick. I would rate this one as 7 out of 10. Some scenes/events should have been justified and also the ending. I would have made it end differently, wont mention it here because I don't want to reveal how it ends.

Johnny Gaddar

2007-10-01T11:18:00.000+05:30

Whenever I go to watch some movie in a hall, I gauge its interest quotient by looking at the time i took to take out my cell and start playing silly games on it. In Manorama, I was restless after 45 minutes (maybe because i didnt smoke in past 3 hrs) while in Dhamaal, most of the time i was busy with my cell. In the case of Johnny Gaddar (JG), my cell was in my pocket for good 95% of the movie. That should tell how gripping its story is, even though during the end i got restless(bored would not be a right word for this movie). Most of the thrillers are based on who dunnit or why dunnit, even nearly all the heist movies are based on the formula of how dunnit but JG stands apart amongst all these. Most of the viewers with intelligence level greater than that of a new born baby would have got the idea that who is JG by looking at the trailers itself . The director also shows no signs to conceal who is gaddar in first half an hour of the movie itself. Even we are told about how dunnit portion in the first half only!!( An average K-series tv director takes atleast 90 episodes to show this stuff :P). Second half of the movie shows the struggle of the gaddar and how one crime leads to another. Its during the later part of the second half that the movie seems to drag along and you wish that the director would have done something better.
The movie borrows many scenes from various movies and whats good is the fact that director is totally unapologetic about it. Parwana (Do watch this AB, Navin Nischol starrer if u havent) is mentioned more than twice in the movie. Homage to Vijay Anand and Chase is apparent throughout the movie. To top it all there's one scene where Dharam Paji says, "Aisa kuchh to Scarface me bhi tha na!!". Now thats known as coming of age homage.
Coming to the things that I loved in JG; First and foremost , the opening credits. That was creativeness maximized and even after watching the whole movie, the thing that I loved the most remains the opening credit. Then comes Vinay Pathak , this man seems to hit boundaries on every delivery he gets(ya there are some dot balls like Buddha Mar Gaya, about that some other day). Last week it was Manorama, and he betters it by giving yet another awesome performance in JG. In his last scene when he knows the truth about JG and knows his fate next, we can literally feel what Prakash (his character's name) is feeling at that moment. Nowadays even Om Puri sahab can not do that magic. Zakir Hussain comes next on my list. He was typecast earlier as sincere looking(idiot inside) villain by RGV in Sarkar, Shiva and some other RGV movies which i'll never see but here he is given full chance to prove his acting skill and he come out with flying colors( somewhat similar to the printed shirts he is made to wear in JG :P). Neil Mukesh looks impressive in his debut but his dialog delivery seemed patchy in some scenes and he lacked what some call chemistry in the scenes with Rimi sen. During most part of the movie his facial expressions remain more or less same but I would give benefit of doubt to him as all these acts suit his character in the movie. Even if he doesnt "act" in few more movies still his future looks bright thanks to his great looks(Common John is doing the same!!). Background score of the movie is rocking and sometimes takes back to 70's. DharamPaaji is good in parts but why did the director give him English lines when he looks soooooo good speaking Punju-hindi/Urdu. Mr. Raghwan should have taken some cue from Anurag Basu who although showed Dharam paji as an NRI but still all his dialogs in Metro were in Hindi/Urdu. (Even the letter that he wrote to Nafisa was in Urdu). Rimi sen is forgettable once again. Only an actor of her caliber can do such poor job in a role which didnt require any histrionic. Supporting cast includes Vinay Ptahak's wife (Ashwini Kalsekar) who is simply brilliant but I felt she overdid herself in the last scene. Scenes between Vinay and Ashwini are not only written brilliantly but these two seasoned performers have shown that how good scenes on paper are made better on screen. Govind Namdev overacts in his short cameo and even his southie accent is on and off throughout his cameo. It seems he thought that he will sleepwalk through the role but surely he falls flat.
The pace of the movie is just fine, neither too racy, nor too sluggish. All thanks some crisp editing. The DoP has done some brilliant job and some of the shots look really good. The way music is included in the movie shows the director's music sense. One last thing for the dialog writer: Bhai kya dhansu dialog likhe hia, agar main yeh movie single theater cinema hall me dekh rah hota to seeti zaroor bajata.
This movie is worth watching, once atleast.

Now this was a World Cup

2007-09-25T11:38:00.000+05:30

I truly feel lucky to have witnessed the final of Inaugural T20 world cup (Although luckier were those who watched it live along with HOTTTT cheerleaders). I have always felt unlucky not to have witnessed 1983 victory or 1985 Champions trophy final but now I have atleast some thing to tell to my grandkids :). Last 3 ODI world cup finals have been a shame with no resistance shown by the other team. This WAS the final that everybody wanted to witness since ages. Most of the matches in this world cup were atleast interesting for 80% of their duration. What more do you want from the world cup??
Coming to the Team India, it quite resembles to the young team that won Sahara Cup against Pakistan under leadership of quite young Sachin. That series was won due to the single fact that team went there with Nothing-to-Lose attitude and nobody even gave them a chance of winning match against the mighty Pakistan. Batting never clicked for both the sides but it was inexperienced medium pace of Ganguly, Mohanty and Harvindar Singh which did the trick for India. Ganguly hadnt quite settled into the side, Mohanty and Singh had no reputation to live upto they just played with big heart and thats what matters in an Indo-Pak encounter.
Same goes with the current Indian side. When the team landed in SA, nobody gave them a chance of even reaching the semis but they played with big heart and almost no pressure. One can see that they were enjoying every outing. Even if they would have lost the final nobody could have been blamed.
After Ganguly we have yet another in-your-face caption who isnt afraid of saying what his heart feels. The trust that he has on his players is commendable. In post match interview he said that he didnt want to take chances with a bowler who wasnt 100% sure (Bhajji) instead he wanted to support a bowler who wanted to make a mark in the international arena. One can imagine the respect Dhoni will get from the youngsters for this kind of attitude. It will be interesting to see once he becomes the captain of the Test side and apply the same formula there too.
This world cup has given hope to many young talents (not just in India) that they can make it to the final eleven on the basis of fitness and sharp cricketing acumen. I cant remember last two world cups churning out the likes of Misbah,Sohial Tanvir, Rohit Sharma, Joginder. You can see only Indo-Pak names in the list and thats the reason that these two teams made it to the finals.
Now I just hope that Dhoni keeps his feet grounded and his head perfectly on his shoulders for the upcoming season

Manorama SFU

2007-09-24T16:51:00.001+05:30

Before starting to write my views (i am not qualified enough to churn out a review :P) I must confess that I have read numerous reviews, previews, behind the scene diaries etc etc and any resemblance to any such article is purely co-incidental. :D
Khair, I went to watch Manorama with loads of expectations (as it was recommended by Mr. Anurag Kashyap himself) and to sum it all, I didn't return empty handed. Since its a thriller involving lots of twists and turns (sadly most of them happen during second half) so i would not divulge into the details of the story but surely i would like to tell that in spite of being a thriller, it appears to be too slow esp in the first half. The knowledgeable people call it paying homage to the "Noir" genre of 50's but only question I would like to ask is that wasn't the director thinking about aam junta who payed 175 bucks to watch the movie.
Still that takes nothing away from the debutant director Navdeep who shows his brilliance in EVERY frame of the movie. The story is set in Lakhot district in Rajasthan and I am very glad with the way Navdeep has shown the small town and its very small details in the movie. One cant help but notice the funny posters that are a very normal scene in any small town in North India. Also the introduction scene of Vinay Pathak is shown very intelligently. These things showed that the director and his team did their homework well and god how well have they done it!!
Coming to the performances, Abhay Deol delivers yet another good performance but his voice modulation lacks the knockout punch. He looks well prepared physically for the role of a man who has a kid and a wife but wants something more for himself but Abhay looked unprepared mentally for the role. Trivia: Irrfan Khan was to play Abhay's part in the movie but due to lack of finances the director had to settle with Abhay. Surely Irrfan would have taken the movie to another level. Gul Panag is right on target in a role which is of a real(not a saas bahu type) housewife who runs a saloon. She essays the role with such an ease that we wonder why the industry hasn't given her more chances. Only thing which i didn't appreciate in her role was her posh accent which could have been altered for the role which shows her to hail from Rohtak. Raima Sen average in her outing but clearly needs to improve on the dialog delivery. The supporting cast is TOPNOTCH. The character of Abhay's intruding/jealous yet submissive neighbor is simply too good (played by the same guy who played Suggi in Haasil). Even the tiny one-second-zero-dialog role of his wife and her neighbor is amazing. Sarika doesnt has much to do in the movie and Kulbhushan Kharbanda is yet again totally reliable as a scheming politician. Vinay Pathak is simply awesome and I wished he had some more of the screen time. Lastly the characters of two goons are quite properly etched and provide some relief in the first half.
Though it was slowly paced in first half, still i liked the movie due to the braveness of the director and the treatment he gave to the subject. This movie stands out amongst the Dhamaals, Hey babyys and Dhols which are being lapped up by the junta. I was disheartened to see quite few people in the audi and heard that Dhol had 80% opening.

Lastly I want to confess that I havent seen Chinatown yet and even if the director has copied frame by frame of the classic (which i dont think is true), still i would laud his effort as very few people would have done Chinatown in Lakhot and fewer would have done it so brillantly.

(I dont like to give stars to the movie so dont scroll down for stars or ratings :P)

--Dubey